2004: Will the world have to endure another 4 years with this President Select?
It still depends on Florida
whether we will be
(am)bushed or gored
Nov. 8, 2000, 8:30 a.m. CET
... and still going on!
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January 2001: By now, of course, everybody is thoroughly sick of the whole thing and everybody, including Republicans, knows who really won the elections (... it sure wasn't Dubya). But a little help from brother Jeb, some voter intimidation and other shenanigans sure go a long ways.
Most interesting: Was anybody actually interested in finding out how the people of Florida really voted? Or was the real question what obscure and mostly contradictory laws could be used by feuding armies of lawyers to support one side or the other?
For details on how it was all finagled, please read Michael Moore's "Stupid White Men."
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Here's the real reason why the Democrats lost the elections:
It's just that I've been caught up in the festivities of the season ... so many parties you know (well, I work for so many companies) and I'm not the party animal of days gone by and I'm pooped. I know you thought it would never happen, but normally I enjoy a quiet night with a movie and the company of my stuffed animals. (Besides, they think I'm so very clever and they're all Democrats.) Too bad they couldn't vote since that's about how many more we needed.
- Karraine Murray
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To end on an upbeat note, here's a suggestion that would put an end to such election problems once and for all:
Turn the U.S.A. into a hereditary monarchy for the Bushes!
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Last updated on 19.01.04 by Johannes Beilharz